« Home | November Rally Conspiracy Theory » | Cheap Domains Registrations : Google for $10 or Go... » | Waveless Rumor - Baidu Wants to Buy Video Sharing ... » | Top New Magazines for the Ultra Rich » | Busting Illegals = Higher Steak Prices? » | Guess Who Has the Most Honest Job? » | Goldman Bankers: Please Stop Hitting on the Barten... » | Another Flogger Exposed - Sony in Hot Water for Fa... » | Asia, Europle, and America's Top Young Entrepreneu... » | You Don't Need to Show Up at Work if You Work at B... »

December 16, 2006

Subway , Eat Fresh, Get Diarrhea

posted by MR WAVETHEORY at 12/16/2006 02:35:00 PM
Not a day goes by without a case of food poisoning at Taco Bell or Olive Garden. Recently, I've had my own case of the bug. I think I caught it from Subway. If you've been to Subway, you know that Subway serves these giant foot long sandwiches that are made fresh. You can call them giant salads stuffed between a giant folded piece of baked break. I'm a big health buff. I eat organic foods, no pesticide fruits, and organic beef. Sometimes, though, it's hard to avoid fast food. So, when I have a hankering for fast food, I skip MacDonald's Corporation (NYSE MCD), Jack In the Box Inc. (Nasdaq JBX) and Burger King, and go with Subway.

Last week, when I got hungry, I ordered a footlong Chipotle Steak and Cheese with Honey Wheat bread. It was made fresh, but I doubt the ingredients were fresh. I had the works on this monster - cucumbers, lettuce, olives, tomatoes, pickles, and olives. No salt and pepper - got to keep it healthy. It was nicely toasted in a TurboChef Oven (Nasdaq OVEN) and as I downed this huge sandwich, this sandwich just tasted delicious. If they do one thing right at Subway, it's the bread. God I love these sandwiches. It was gone in 10 minutes flat!

But it came back! These last couple of days, I've been having a nasty case of the big D - diarrhea. And I kept wondering what's been causing me these stomach problems. As I went through a list of what I had eaten recently, it became clear to me it was the footlong steak and cheese from Subway. That bug infested sandwich must have been made with lettuce and tomatoes that have been sitting out in the open for days before I ordered it.

I often wonder when I stride into these Subways, how long they keep their lettuce, tomatoes, and other condiments in their little deli containers before restocking them. I've been to Subways where there was basically no business with the order taker/sandwich maker lounging around waiting for people to come in. How silly of me to eat at Subway! They could be serving the same lettuce from two or three days ago with some of the nastiest little buggers growing in them. After all, they are franchisee run (read "ultra profit driven"). Imagine the weapons grade e.coli that could be growing in these little vats of lettuce at Subway. Forget Taco Bell or Olive Garden. They might serve a little e.coli infested lettuce as a condiment, but at Subway, the main ingredient is lettuce. If I were a clever and entrepreneurial third world dictator bent on launching a biological scare with America, I would forget about anthrax, ricin, or whatever 10 syllable bacteria I can't pronounce. I would just start a chain of Subways and start fermenting my own homegrown weapons of mass infection in my local deli.

Better yet, I would put these Subways on wheels and drive them around. These weapons of mass infection, growing at mobile Subway food centers, would propogate quite some damage. I would have these little Subways on wheels make quick drives thru low income neighborhood and start tossing out free steak and cheese sandwiches. In a few days, I'd bet you - odds of better than 10-to-1 - that you'd be hearing of massive outbreaks of diarrhea and food poisoning that would knock out half of America's workforce. The executives at Subway would make any enemy of America proud!

In all honesty, I have lost my appetite for Subway and I am not sure I want to "eat fresh" ever again at Subway. The thought of e.coli infested lettue dancing in my dreams is enough to cause me enough nightmares for the next ten years. Bye bye Subway! You can keep your lettuce and shove it up your *** 0: I mean Christmas stocking.

Previous Posts


Blogger cheats said...

bad car credit loan refinancing
bad credit auto refinancing
bad credit car refinancing
bad credit home refinancing
bad credit mortgage refinancing
bad credit refinancing
bad credit refinancing home loan
credit mortgage poor refinancing
poor credit refinancing
refinancing home with poor credit
bad credit mortgage refinancing

7:44 AM  
Blogger Debra said...

I've seen roaches in every subway I have ever eaten at more than once...and every time they were near the lettuce...YIKES!

5:57 PM  
Blogger alex said...

i have had the shits for 3 days now

thank you subway!!!

5:20 PM  
Blogger Dan said...

I had a footlong for lunch today and im now sitting in toliet posting this msg

5:23 PM  
Blogger inionj said...

I'm dying right now...... 6 inch sub and one hour later....SPLAT!

7:46 PM  
Blogger Amy Gravelle said...

I was told that it's a preservative they put on the lettuce. They used to cut the lettuce fresh, now it comes pre-chopped in a bag. God knows what they spray on it.

7:42 PM  
Blogger Captain Porcelain said...

Had the steak and cheese, onions, extra mayo, s&p..That's it. Had half a foot long, went in as a solid came out as a liquid. Ate the other half the next day with the exact same results. At least we now know how Jared lost all that weight.....diarrhea and vomiting. That guy ate there everyday, couldn't even imagine the pain that must have caused.

5:23 AM  
Blogger tm said...

Yes to all of the above. My salad with ranch dressing had spinach and all the veggies, except lettuce.
An hour later, I was in the bathroom and ready for that dreaded colonoscopy.

8:19 AM  
Blogger chenlina said...

discount oakley sunglasses
coach outlet online
christian louboutin sale
louis vuitton outlet
ray ban outlet
louis vuitton outlet
michael kors
christian louboutin shoes
hollister kids
michael kors outlet
michael kors
michael kors uk
abercrombie fitch
michael kors outlet online
pandora charms
michael kors outlet
jordan shoes
air max 95
christian louboutin outlet
oakley sunglasses
ray bans
louis vuitton
red timberland boots
toms shoes
celine handbags
gucci outlet
coach outlet
louis vuitton outlet
kevin durant basketball shoes
caoch outlet
coach factorty outlet
kobe 9
kate spade outlet online
michael kors
louis vuitton outlet
concord 11
christian louboutin outlet
oakley sunglasses
coach outlet online
chanel handbags

11:49 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

hollister clothing
red bottom shoes
oakley outlet
jordan retro 11
jordan retro 11
adidas outlet store
coach factory outlet
celine handbags
abercrombie store new york
kobe bryant shoes for kids
air jordans
louis vuitton
jordan 4s
cheap oakley sunglasses
abercrombie and fitch outlet
christian louboutin
true religion outlet
cheap nfl jerseys
ray-ban sunglasses
louis vuitton outlet
burberry handbags
oakley sunglasses
true religion
michael kors
coach factory outlet
christian louboutin sale
air max uk
replica watches
polo ralph lauren
hollister jeans
louis vuitton outlet
louis vuitton handbags
red shoes
michael kors outlet online
hollister clothing store

7:48 PM  
Blogger Quynh Anh said...

Lol, me too. It doesn't take that long.

9:55 PM  
Blogger Quynh Anh said...

Lol, me too. It doesn't take that long.

9:56 PM  
Blogger Quynh Anh said...

Lol, good point!

9:57 PM  
Blogger Quynh Anh said...

Lol, good point!

9:57 PM  
Blogger Trey Jackson said...

It's definitely not the lettuce, because I've tried every variation possible for the majority of sandwiches and items there and just about everything gives me the worst bathroom visit within about 8-48 hours later! Not too mention all the food they get comes from the majority of livestock and veggies sold in America(gmos, added hormones, rbst, antibiotic filled livestock, dangerous pesticides, preservatives and additives!) Thanks MONSANTO for trying to solve world hunger by mass poisoning;)

10:53 PM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home